Emotions.....they sure can be strange sometimes...

Well I know I didn't write Friday night because I was just kinda busy/taking time to relax and then Saturday I had time to write, but didn't feel inspired, but here I am Sunday and I think I am ready to write about something. Today I went to church just as I do every Sunday and I had one of those Sundays that I have every once in awhile....we were singing some amazing worship songs and I had an incredible urge to just burst into tears...like so much that I had to stop singing at certain parts and as much as I tried to fight it, a few little tears streaked out of my eyes. (Lucky for Floyd he wasn't at church with me today because he gets so embarassed if I ever cry in public and he just hates that I cry in general, he doesn't get the whole crying thing....I think it's another thing to add to the long list of cultural differences.) NEways....this whole urge to cry, it's not like a bad cry....it's a good one! It's hard to identify all that I am feeling at the time, but it's kind of like I'm feeling so happy that God chose me and is always with me and watching over me and guiding, providing, etc.  It also feels as if all the hurt I have had from various things in my life doesn't even matter anymore....it's just gone & I feel so lucky, so loved, and so at peace. It's like I am just bursting with all these positive emotions that I don't even know what to say, what to think, or how to act.....so apparently that makes me feel like I should cry my eyes out....haha! that makes no sense, but it's ok, it doesn't have to! During worship we sang two of my new favorite songs which I don't know the titles to, but the one is talking about how God never lets go of us and is with us through everything. I really like the song, not because I am so worried about Him staying with me through things now, but more so because I can't believe he stuck with me for so long until everything finally "clicked" and I got this whole relationship with Christ. I mean seriously, I was a preacher's kid, had great family influences and went to (in my opinion) the best Christian university out there, but still failed to 100% "get" the whole Christian thing. I guess I am just a really slow learner.....so I am glad that God loves us slow learners just as much as the rest. :o) The other song is one that talks about not wanting to live by just going through the motions. I am pretty sure I have been going through the motions a good majority of the time and it's just so great now to realize that I have the ability to live my life as more than that. So yea....I know this is all kind of random, but I am really trying to be open and share what I am going through.
OH &....I actually raised my hands a little while we were singing worship songs in church today....never really had anything against people who did that, just never felt the need to do it myself. Not sure what all is going on with me, but I know that I like it. :o) On a lighter note my weekend was splendid with a MOPS meeting with friends, a morning run & breakfast with another friend, pool time with the kids, relaxing with Floyd, and a nice little outting with the whole family. I should head to bed now though.
May God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ give you grace and peace.